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Anti-Pickup Line

 

He: You're as pretty as a picture.
She: Thank you.
He: Unfortunately, it's a picture of shit.
She: -__-

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  • +3
0 Comments
 

He: Did you fall from Heaven?
She: Well...
He: 'Cos I got an erection.
She: -__-

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  • -4
0 Comments
 

If i'd ask you if you want to f*ck me, would your answer be the same as to this question?

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  • +17
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-wow I could just drown in the ocean of your eyes
-well why don't you
-well I'll steal your sisters number, get lost at sea, and shipreck in her bed
Then you can come and save us when she is shouting S.O.S out of the other room

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What's the difference between a Jew and a boyscout?

The boyscout returned from camp.

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2 Comments
 

- What's a shabby girl like you doing in a lovely place like this?

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whats up ho

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1 Comment
 

If I could rearrange the alphabet I'd put "U" and "I" as far apart as possible.

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Me: it smells in here
Her: its maybe my perfume!
Me: no i let a glorious fart fallowed my an ass crapping on my foot

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1 Comment
 

if i was a fly, i'd be all over you, because you are the SHIT.

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Girl: Go f**k yourself

Guy: can you help me?

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violets are blue
roses are red
you have a mouth
start giving me head

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Anti-Pickup Line

A collection of responses to pickup lines, and just bad ones in general!

The Anti Joke Book




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Quotes From Other Sites

  • “The air conditioning in Lamborghinis used to be an asthmatic sitting in the dashboard blowing at you through a straw..”

    via: Clarksonisms

  • “educational video games.”

    via: Pointless Inventions

  • “The power to whant badly to have kids but you give birth to massive amounts of spiders, ducklings and some undefined type of small feline....”

    via: Pointless Super Powers

  • “When I'm watching a movie I have already seen I hope for a different ending but soon realize it won't happen.”

    via: Things You Think Only You Do

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