-I lost my phone number. Can I have yours? -No.

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Get in the van.

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EVERYONE ELSE

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My greatest strength is my self-deprecating sense of humor, but its probably not worth getting to know me.

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girl:go away! boy:okay girl:i need space boy:okay just one meter girl: no i"m not kidding boy:i know girl:my mother hate's you boy:i hate her too.! girl:we are now break boy:okay i"m hungry lets eat! girl:you don't understand me boy:no i"m understand you girl:you are philosopher i hate you boy:what? girl:nothing at the end of the story they loved each other

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Guy: Do you have a mirror in your pocket... Girl: Why? Because you can see yourself in my pants, I've heard that before. Guy: No, I want to check how I look before I go over and talk to your sister.

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Did it hurt? When you fell from the hoe tree and banged every dick on the way down?

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Whats small, rough, and painful to put in your ass? Sandpaper

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Hey Baby, Whats your name? Dave ...(silence)...

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Man: Lady... Seriously, I got a PhD! Woman: Seriously, you look more like an athlete, in what? Man: Lady... I got a pretty huge Richard. Moral: RICHAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAARDS!

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So I saw you walk into the bar from the scope of my rifle and I was wondering if you'd enjoy some unconsentual sex in the back of my van?

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Do your parents have Down Syndrome? Because your really special.

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Are your parents retarded? Because you're something special

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I love every bone in your body, especially mine.

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The anti part of below comment, may be the fact that its going to get thumbed down to Hades. Moral: They see me rollin, they envious... women that look like supermodels that work as jurists dont come easy... unless you are Moral Man. *Plays moral man theme* (Character inspired by Salvador Dali, I mean what greater inspiration than the man that celebrated each day as he woke up in the body and mind of the greatest man ever? Me? Same, but I also wake up next to the greatest woman ever.)

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-I like my woman like I like my coffee... without a penis

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Hey girl, I just fixed your pipes, I got a pipe of my own that needs some fixing if you know what I mean ;) Moral: Pornography is a lie.

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You got some junk in the trunk, can I dump my load in there too?

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The invention that gets me around 20 red thumbs averge. Moral: <<<<< Thiz. Its better tto be infamous, than forgotten.

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I'm your Edward and your my Bella

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How much does a polar bear weight? Enough to break the ice... and throw you into the freezing water and drown you, because you're really ugly.

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you look fap-fap-fap-fabulous

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- Hey do you wanna hang out? - I'm 17.

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"Hey did I not meet you at the singles and desperates club?"

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Anti-Pickup Line

A collection of responses to pickup lines, and just bad ones in general!

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