Is that a mirror in your pocket? Use it next time you put your d**n make-up on.

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Girl: "In all of my years, I've never laid eyes on a more attractive, sensitive, and understanding man. With all of my heart, I adore you. Your eyes are pools of heavenly water, teeming with life and love; your succulent smile crafted as elegantly as Mona Lisa's. Your words could move nations; your voice could soothe beasts. Do me the ultimate pleasure of accepting my eternal devotion to you." Boy: "I'm gay."

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The power to type any pointless superpower at the wrong place... ...shit...

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- Are you from Tennessee bec- - Yes

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Man, stay alive, I dont even got time to read that shit. See you around son.

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adam burdass

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Try to put your arm around her. If she pushes you away, then say: "Relax! Relax. I'll pay for the first abortion!"

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Man: Your body is a tempe! Woman: Sorry, no services today.

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Man: Hey I am the hunk that writes the stories with morals, and I thumb them up myself... since they mostly get thumbed down slower that way... Ladies: REALLY! WOW WE NEVER THOUGHT WE WOULD MEET A CELEBRITY! LETS HAVE AN ORGY! Man: HEY! LADIES WAIT WAIT! ONLY 8 AT THE TIME! HELP I AM GETTING GRAPED!... Anyway who am I kidding please proceed but stop fighting over the joystick I have enough joy to all thanks to my writing progress!¨ Moral: His-tory AKa My-Story, and you know that they say that the winners are the one to write history ;), and if you do not know what I mean, you are probable banging me too right now... (true story)

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Did you just fart coz you're blowing me away!

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Man: If I ask you to go on a date, would the answer to that question be the same as the answer to this one? Woman: (pause) Rape!

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Man: Hey you are so pretty I bet you are a hooker! Woman: Uh.. thanks but no.. Man: Damn... I was hoping to get laid tonight...

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showing people this http://hahgay.com/ p.s after seeng any girls want to come back to my place

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How much do you love me? Look at the stars and count them Bu-but it's afternoon Exactly

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Guy: Have you ever seen a rhinoceros? Girl:No. Why? Guy: So you don't have a mirror in your house?

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hey, your cute. hey, your not.

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-Do you mind if i smoke? -No. I dont even mind if you burn....

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M: Hey whats up? W: My Dick!

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-If I could rearrange the alphabet, I'd put U and I together -The order of the alphabet is arbitrary. It's not my fault that you kept U and I apart.

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-Do you come here often? -Yeah, but now that you're here, I think I'll find another bar.

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If I could rearrange the alphabet, I'd put you in between F and CK.

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Can I have this dance? Sure just give me a minute to load my gun

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hello my name is pogo would you like to jump on my stick?

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If you were a booger, that'd be pretty nasty.

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Anti-Pickup Line

A collection of responses to pickup lines, and just bad ones in general!

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The Anti Joke Book


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