-hey, come here a minute.

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- I put the STD in STUD, all I need is U - ...

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Guy: Do you wanna be the sun of my life? Girl: Ok sure Guy: Then go stand 13. billion miles away from me

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If i could rearrange the alphabet, I would put 'I' and 'U' together. Really? Cos' I like it just the way it is... With 'N' and 'O' together.

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Classic story time: Shit that happens out there. Girl: Omg that guy called you a douche! Go punch him! Or else my respect for you is gone. Man: Hey, you called me a douche right? Well... FALCOWN PAWNCH! Girl: Omg you are so violent, my respect for you is gone. Moral: Really, I am speechless... Its a lose/lose situation.

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Sickman Fraud: Hmm you look remotely alike my mother... Woman: Uh? Sickman Fraud: Yes fucking you should das probably give me some release, die reason to resist me is not necessary, you envy my pingas and I can assign it to you if you put on this ugly wig and yell "bad boy" whilzt I das fukte das rassenhol... Woman: OMG SICK! Moral: The father of modern psychology? Seriously?! I was going for a bachelor in psychology studies, but its just disgusting.

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Him: Did it hurt? Her: What? Him: When you fell out of the whore tree and banged every guy on the way down?

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This one is for the ladies: Man: If I could put 6 and 9 on my calculator we would have the greatest time ever ;) Woman: If you did that id just put 911 on my cellphone.

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Man: Hello! I am SUPERMAN! And you are so hot you are my Kryptonite! Woman: then you better get lost before you die! Man: Uh well... yeah uh... walks away (in non super speed strangely) Moral: Think things trough sometimes...

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Guy:Are you wearing space pants, cause that ass is out of this world! Girl:No, they're baseball pants, cuz this ass is out of your league.

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boy: hey wanna hang out some time?! girl: O MY GOD! r u hannah montanna?!

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Q: How did the baby cross the road A: He was stapled to the chicken

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2 fake blondes hitting on me. blondes: we're twins! me: so where are you from? blonde1: canada! blonde2 (at the same time): finland!

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It rubs the lotion onto it's skin

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You belong in heaven. So make sure you say hi to God for me.

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For you thinking what is that shit below this comment? Go fuck yourself, for those that wonder why I typed that excellence, well read whatever... So why am I here once a year and type a lot of insanity here? Because I am quitting smoking... AGAIN. So after banging two chicks (one my wife STEAKSAUCE!) I just want a smoke right? RIGHT? To chill the adrenaline... My wife does not smoke (well if you can smoke cock then she is still the best smoker in town) Seriously, Tina has Prince... That explains her breath ugh... I am gonna get one anyways for great justice.

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Hey baby. Do you drive a slug bug on a rainbow? If so, I'll drive.

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Are you a speeding, aggressive driver? Because your running straight up my ass

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girl, are you a christian? Sure... Do you believe in me? I dont even know you! Well, met God? No? You love him!

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Dude: I don't wanna be friends anymore! Dudette: I take it that you found out about my feelings. Dude: Yes. And, at the rate this is going, staying where we are now gets us nowhere. Dudette: *sparkly eyes* So... you mean... Dude: Yes. We are more than friends. I realize that you have realized that. In fact... *steps to whisper in her ear* ... we're like BROTHERS. Dudette: 3

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Hey, I may not be too smart, I may not have a big dick, I may not be strong nor cool, but at least I uh...

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Waiter- For you, sir? Male: I'll have a Strawberry Daquiri, non-alcoholic, please. Waiter- And, for your company? Male: For her, a long-island-iced-tea, with a twist of Rohypnol.

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Hey wanna hear about some pointless superpowers? ;)

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-Hey, what's your sign? -I don't know, but yours must be Cancer.

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Anti-Pickup Line

A collection of responses to pickup lines, and just bad ones in general!

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