-"Hey babe, you gotta nice ass!" -"Yep, and it doesn't like a rude one staring at it."

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Twinkle winkle little star, cuz my star is what you are... Moral: Heh, that one might actually work if you do it spontaneously and mean it, damn I keep failing at making bad pickuplines, I am so good I cannot fail! I WANT TO FAIL! (Legal disclaimer: Not really I just go hi-wire after... "flirting" yeaaaaaaah lets be subtle now "Moral" Man)

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Why are you crying? I have to walk out these woods alone!

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Man: Well I usually do not bang women your uh... particular size, I mean you are a bit too big for me and um... I got standards... nothing personal but... I uh.. well ok lets try... I guess I stick it here and... Man2: HEY what the hell are you doing to my trailer you drunk bastard! Moral: Standards... we all have it.... just not that much of it...

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Guy: Did you use Windex on your pants? Girl: No, why? Guy: Because I see myself in your pants.

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free candy....

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Man: Hey you female? Cuz I am a horny man and... *door slams*

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you know what rhymes with hug me LET'S HAVE SEX

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-My love for you is like diarrhea, I cant hold it in...

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- Yo baby can I have your number? - Sure! My number is one *sticks up middle finger*

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This is what Nero calls for his "destroyer" not sure if I should consider that flattering, he thinks so anyways, he just wants to say, that why the fuck are people suddenly scared of looooooooooooooooooooooong messages on the interbewbs. "No leave it be, interbewsbs sounds prefect" Nero The Hero "FINAL FRESH" What Nero And Vagina shouts? :)) Something is off here but he has passed out again :)) "God woman, you suck at pop cultural quotes" Nero, the fucklord (omg, he is crazy, gotta love this guy) "thanks" Nero the grateful. "I Ask you if you know who I am by saying "ITS ME MARIO and you still do not know what name is? THe red plumber Nintendo HIS NAME IS MARIO!?" Nero The (fucking annoyed at me) :)) Sorry guys just having fun. "THOU SHALL NEVER APOLOGIzE FOR THE WORD OF NERO" -Nero insists, I mean the LORD OF DARKNESS INSISTS "Can we fucking stop making quotes of me now? All the girls are laughing at me, WHY AM I SO DEFEATED!" Last quote added without his consent

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Let's not turn this rape into a murder..

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I'll punch ya!

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Online Desperate Asians.com Man: Wow you are a cute asian girl! Where are you from? Girl: Thanks my name Aoi is I am from Japan, you look like nice older man! Man: Japan? Awesome! Remember when we nuked the hell out of your country? Happy days! SLAP A JAP! *Connection discontinued* Man: Eh really sorry, I just get nervous when I meet girls especially the cutest ones... Man: hello?

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Guy enters a bar: Guy: I have some really bad self-esteem and would really apreciate if someone would give me a chance and... Gorgeous woman: Hey, I would love to get to know you, and maybe take you home and... Guy: WHAT? THIS DOES NOT HAPPEN TO ME! I CANT HANDLE IT! HEEEEEEEEEEELP! (Runs out of bar screaming)

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No more morals? I read his crap for hours! Moral: ;( Bye man.

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Your so hot my pants will explode if I don't take them off now...

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Male: (Pulls Female in close, strokes her hair, and mutters 'My precious' over and over to himself)

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Are you from Tennessee? Youre the only 10 i see, and im 59. I bet we could 69 beautifully.

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A man is pulled over by a police officer and a conversation takes place: Man: What's the problem officer? Cop: You were going at least 75 in a 55 zone. Man: No sir, I was going 65. Wife: Oh Steven. You were going 80. (Man gives his wife a dirty look.) Cop: I'm also going to give you a ticket for your broken tail light. Man: Broken tail light? I didn't know about a broken tail light! Wife: Oh Steven, you've known about that tail light for weeks. (Man gives his wife a dirty look.) Cop: I'm also going to give you a citation for not wearing your seat belt. Man: Oh, I just took it off when you were walking up to the car. Wife: Oh Steven, you never wear your seat belt. Man: Shut your mouth, woman! Cop: Ma'am, does your husband always talk to you this way? Wife: No, only when he's drunk.

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Man: Wanna come to my place? Woman: Maybe if you take of the ski-mask and black clothing... Man: But then you'll ruin the surprise! :(

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-How did your date go last night? -It was going alright but then I started crying uncontrollably. -Nervous habit? -Pepper spray.

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Muslim guy: "Hey can I get your number?" Chick:"Nine eleven"

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Is that a banana in your pants? Can I have yours?

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Anti-Pickup Line

A collection of responses to pickup lines, and just bad ones in general!

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