- Anti-Pickup Line

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK! Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

I'll eat your poop

The word of the day is legs, Lets go upstairs and spread the word.

Dude: Did you fart? Girl: No Dude: Oh I'm sorry because you blew me away

HEY BITCH! GET YOUR ASS HOME AND GIVE ME A THUMBS UPS AT HORSEHEAD NETWORK! Moral: And be rewarded ;) (unless you are fucking ugly, then you still get the gift of voting me whatever way you want)

Boy-That's a nice outfit. Girl-Thanks!!! Boy- It would look even better scrunched up at the end of my bed.

Man: I am willing to give my life for you. Woman: How about you fucking get one instead and rather seek me out then? Moral: M-M-M-Morale breaker!

Roses are red, Violets are blue, The holocaust was a disaster, and so are you.

guy: you're so beautiful, did you fall from heaven? girl: if I was I would be dead by now hun?

Honestly bitch, I hate you, but my balls are bursting so its either you or the next disgusting ugly bitch in line, my mom!

Come lay your head upon my chest. (After a moment) Perhaps you'd be more comfortable onmy stomache (pushes head down)

The word of the day is ass, lets go upstairs and observe the word.

-Roses are red, violets are... -SHOW ME YOUR TITS

man: you look like my favorite girl. Girl: is that so? Man: yupp, best dog i ever had.

Hey girl, I heard you are a lesbian! So which part of lesbia are you from? Moral: Geography is overrated, he got laid.

Man: I would kill anyone at anytime for a kiss from you. Woman: Kill yourself now.

Monday went by and he didn't see her Tuesday was the same Wednesday came and the swelling had finally gone down for him to make his wife out

You stole my heart..... Don't worry, i have three more back home in my freezer.

Guy: Is it hot in here or did i just break the ice? Girl: No, it was your weight.

here's 20p, phone your Mum... she'll be the last person you ever speak to so be nice

Guy: Hi, I am sexually attracted to you. May I walk over to the bar and purchase you a drink and then another and then another untill you become intoxicated and more likely to allow me to have sexual intercourse with you? Girl: You speak funny. Get lost.

roses are red violets are blue i have a knife get in the van

Anti-Pickup Line

Our Updated iOS App!

The Anti Joke Book