Are those space pants? Cause there's not enough space in my house to fit your ass.

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Did anyone ever tell you you smell like Catalina? Did anyone ever tell you you smell like a cat?

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hello my name is pogo would you like to jump on my stick?

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Hey girl, I just fuck my diapers, wanna change them ;) Moral: This has to be the one of the worst pickup lines in history.

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Girl: "In all of my years, I've never laid eyes on a more attractive, sensitive, and understanding man. With all of my heart, I adore you. Your eyes are pools of heavenly water, teeming with life and love; your succulent smile crafted as elegantly as Mona Lisa's. Your words could move nations; your voice could soothe beasts. Do me the ultimate pleasure of accepting my eternal devotion to you." Boy: "I'm gay."

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Jack is riding his new yellow bicycle. His father bought it for his 12th anniversary. Jack is ecstatic to have his first ride down his street. Erick thinks its ugly.

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M: You make me wanna be a terrorist! W: Why? M: I so wanna blow on you right now...

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Do you live around here often?

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Dont blame me for using moral all the time its just part of my sig...nature XD Moral: Not a pick up line, so its pretty anti.

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MAN- Wanna have sex? WOMAN- No get away from me you freak?!!! MAN- Well... I gave you a choice...

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Man: Hey is your name Zelda? Woman: Huh? What kind of stupid name is THAT! Man: EXCUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUSE ME PRINCESS! Woman: What a dork... Moral: The man did not link with the woman that night... nor ever it seems...

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why cant you comb your hair cuz you got cancer othere guy :ahahahaah fag

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what goes up and down , side to side all the time? a compass get your mind out of the gudder.

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Your breast is like a beer holder, you would allow me to store beer in between your breasts, while I talk on the phone

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Do you want to see something swell?

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*is your name angel cuz that's all i see? *is your name asshole cuz that's all i see

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At a moral man bar... "the most awesome place on earth": Man: I thumb down my comments now, and somehow they end up thumbed the next day... Woman: Uh... what comments? Moral: Be specific... or at least dont brag to pick up chicks... now if you wanna be yourself and could not give shit about the rest, then go ahead! It will actually improve your chances!

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-I wish i were DNA helicase so i could unzip your genes. -You're a loser

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Guy- Hey, wanna come back to my place? Girl- Umm... I don't think 2 people can fit in that box...

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You must have a large mass because i am highly attracted to you

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I like your shirt, it would look better in my pants

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- Do you wanna play the rape game? - NO! - That's the spirit!

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Man: Do you want to have sex at my house Women: No

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Guy: Can I have your number ? Girl: We are six.

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Anti-Pickup Line

A collection of responses to pickup lines, and just bad ones in general!

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!