Let me stick it in...just once baby...that's all I'll need. ;)

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-don't sit on the table, people eat there! -don't sit on that chair, people sit there!

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A. If I could rearrange the alphabet, I'd put U and I together. B. Oh really? Well, if I could rearrange the alphabet, I'd put N and O together. Oh wait -- they're already there. Huh.

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Girlfriend: you are much more naive when you are naked, and a small penis, no hair and are 23 years old

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Is that a mirror in your pocket? Use it next time you put your d**n make-up on.

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Boy: Did it hurt when you fell from Heaven? Girl: Did it hurt when you were thrust through the ash-filled layers of Hell?

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Man: Do you want to have sex at my house Women: No

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What's your sign? Slippery when wet.

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"Wow, you look so thin! Are you wearing a girdle?"

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here's 20p, phone your Mum... she'll be the last person you ever speak to so be nice

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Does this rag smell like chloroform to you?

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GEDDINTHEFRIGGENCAR

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Im the demanding customer, your Dominos Pizza, I will make you Cum in 30 minutes or less.

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He: Hey bay wanna danc- She: Leave.

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- Are you from Tennessee bec- - Yes

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-Go on don't be shy, Ask me out. -Okay Go out.

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I have a knife, Maddie. Get in the van.

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It's not Rapee If you yell surprise!

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Ay girl, those jeans make your ass look fat. Now I'ma get you pregnant while you make breakfast.

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Ma'am, I'm sorry I'd like to ask a favour. Yes? Well, my penis died and I was wondering if I could bury it in your vagina?

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Man, stay alive, I dont even got time to read that shit. See you around son.

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She - Did it hurt when you fell from heaven? becuase your-- He - I did not fall from heaven, you ignorant little twat.

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Pick up lines from the stone age: Fail. Man: Hello, you look beautiful, I speak very well, and if you allow me to make love with you, I promise I will protect you and raise the child with you :)! Woman: WHAT? A guy without wild chesthair that speaks instead of grunting and yelling? You to sex me and you do not even got a club? I am SOOO gonna go to Grogg instead! He has like the biggest club and knows how to really HIT a woman! Moral: I would say somethings do change, but Id rather be Grogg than the loser above, of course I prefer hitting ON women first, if that does not work I... Oh right, I am married :P

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Man: "Are you a parking ticket? 'Cos you have fine written all over you!" Woman: "Are you an a**hole? 'Cos you're hairy and you smell like s**t!"

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Anti-Pickup Line

A collection of responses to pickup lines, and just bad ones in general!

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The Anti Joke Book


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