- Anti-Pickup Line

that shirt looks nice on you, it would look better on the floor

adam burdass

Are you from tennessee? Because your inbred and retarted.

In a loud bar: Man: Do you enjoy gRape? Woman: HOW DARE YOU YOU PERVERT! Man: Uh... how about raisins then... Woman: Err... can you repeat that first question again... Moral: I would but I would have to bypass the censorship somehow...

M: On a scale of one to America, how free are you tonight? F: North Korea

SYLVIA: Hi! Wanda. WANDA: Hi! Sylvia. How'd you die? SYLVIA: I froze to death. WANDA: How horrible! SYLVIA: It wasn't so bad. After I quit shaking from the cold, I began to get warm & sleepy, and finally died a peaceful death. What about you? WANDA: I died of a massive heart attack. I suspected that my husband was cheating, so I came home early to catch him in the act. But instead, I found him all by himself in the den watching TV. SYLVIA: So, what happened? WANDA: I was so sure there was another woman there somewhere that I started running all over the house looking. I ran up into the attic and searched, and down into the basement. Then I went through every closet and checked under all the beds. I kept this up until I had looked everywhere, and finally I became so exhausted that I just keeled over with a heart attack and died. SYLVIA: Too bad you didn't look in the freezer ---we'd both still be alive....?

roses are red, violets are blue, my toe hurts.

He: Let me be the reason you're up all night. She: You will be. I always wake up when I have nightmares.

Sigh, reminds me I am banging a girl named Tina, and one named Line right? Plus my wife whose name I wont reveal because she matters (Line, Tina, you do not!) Anyway, when people ask me "what the hell was that noise Nero (No idea what Neronism is, fuck him for stealing my name) I tell them "meh I was just screwing Line and Tina" People always go like... Man... YOU DONT HAVE TO LIE TO ME SON! YOU GOT STREET CRED HERE MODAFOCA! Tina and Line? You cant come up with better names SON? EH? If you wanna lie to me again SON, Then you get some original names SON! And I go like... So, can your sister sit down now? And he goes all like SHEET, was that you? Nice score man! And then I went "thats your sister you know that right?" Anyway, you want me now? INSTA ANTI PICKUPLINE... BECAUSE WHO NEEDS PICKUPLINES AT ALL! I AM JUST BEING MEEEEEEEEEEE! AND YOU MIGHT HATE ME!!!!!!! BUT YOU WOMEN STILL END UP TALKING ABOUT HOW YOU HATE THAT GUY YOU FUCKED LAST NIGHT! AND YOUR GIRLFRIENDS! Man... I need another Smoke... SMOKE WINS FAILTALITY. Ps: Yo Harris, stop congratzing me for banging your sister, she is not a nice catch for youz! She is your sistah DUDE! STOP GIVING ME THE THUMBS UPS EVERYTIME SHE COMPLAINS HER ASS IS STILL SORE... I mean does he get it? Or does youz congrats me because you dont understand that Rebecca your "innocent" sister is really into anal something I usually just reserve for the... actually good girls...

Boy-Did it hurt when you fell from heaven? Girl-Not until I heard that horrible pick-up line.

him: why are you so gorgeous? her: i dont know i guess my parents had some really good sex.

Guy - Do you want to go outside and play rape? Girl - No, Guy - That's the spirit

How much do you love me? Look at the stars and count them Bu-but it's afternoon Exactly

Lady: Is your name REAAAAAAAAALLY Moral? Moral: Stupid big titted bimbo... seems im getting laid tonight...just like I was today, and by midday and... yeah lie.. I mean brag a lot I do not have sex THAT many times a day... okay I lied again... Anyway vote me for president at least I am honest... well actually that was a lie but...

He: Hey bay wanna danc- She: Leave.

- Hey baby! You make my heart beat. - Oh, well you make my stomach churn.

If you were a booger i would pick you Good thing you have no hands

your boobs are bigger than my nose

You must be tired... I assume you are because I am after following you on your four mile run through the park today.

Are you a Geodude? Cause you're face is rockin'!

Do women shake the petrol pump after filling or is that just a guy thing?

Can I take a picture of you, so I can show Santa what I don't want for Christmas?

Hey baby, you're really hot, I like girls with some meat for my bone.

-hey baby wanna get a drink? -no but i wanna get the heck away from you

Anti-Pickup Line

A collection of responses to pickup lines, and just bad ones in general!

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