As original as things get: Pickup in the future! Android: Greetings Alpha six zero zero,requesting access code for insertion of my intercourse-D.I.C.K card into your V.A.G 2.0 intercourse receiver! Another Android: Access granted Zero six nine eight, engaging card...System! Deactivate mini-android production systems and engage cooldown systems to avoid critical overheats, lubricate essentials for easy access, I have no entry code, engage at once! Moral: I honestly thought it would end up in failure, but damn androids are easy!

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Hey, does this rag smell like chloroform to you?

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How much does a whales weigh? How much? Just enough to make you look skinny.

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Man: DTF Cutey? Woman: DTF off Asshole?

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Want to get a pizza and fuck? What you don't like pizza?

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You look just like my sister! That's funny,... CUZ IM A DUDE

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You're like a drug to me. why because I'm so addicting?:) No, because you ruined my life.

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On a scale from 1 to 10, can I get your number?

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Is that a mirror in your pants? We should have sex immediately.

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guy: hey baby come join the PEN15 club with mee ;) girl: whats that?? guy: come and i will show you...*goes into the guys restroom with her*....lets go to the restroom and never rest...except you can rest on my PEN15

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- Did it hurt, when you fell from heaven? - Nah, angels like me, have wings.

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-So...wanna come back to my place? -I Dont Know If two people can fit in a box on the street.

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- Have we met? - Honey, we're not meeting now.

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Sigh... No I do not have a van... Just get in the plane!

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Couple in bed: Woman: I want some variation... you into roleplay? Man: Sure! Woman: Ok, Ill be a hot housemaid... Man: OK but they have little mana so... ill be a firemage! Woman: Huh? Man: SHHHH! its not your time to attack yet! Moral: Geeks...

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Hey girl, I am a rich guy with a huge estate and stuff, while you live under a cardboard box so... Your place or mine? Both, I to your place, and you to mine.

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Boy: You know, just because one is beautiful does not mean that she is intelligent. Girl: Really? Boy: Yeah. But I'd like to tell you that you're a very good exception. Girl: Do you really think so? Boy: Of course! You're already ugly, yet you're so incredibly stupid!

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Your face is like mace, every time i see if i get blinded

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- if I could rearrange the alphabet I would put U and I together - If I could rearrange the alphabet I would put U next to Y, just why

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Let's not turn this rape... into a murder

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Order Online Nightwear and short shop online in India

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does this rag smell like Chloroform to you?

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Boy- is that a mirror in your pants? Girl-? Boy-because i see my self in your pants Girl-oh this, this is a picture of crap!

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Intro music with slow motion running starts as I shut off the tv forever

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Anti-Pickup Line

A collection of responses to pickup lines, and just bad ones in general!

Our Updated iOS App!

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!