- Anti-Pickup Line

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK! Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

excuse me my eyes are up here thats great........where are your nipples

-Why is one breast bigger than the other? -because I popped it and all the silicone leaked out

Did It Hurt when you fell from heaven? No, because I was already dead.

Hi there, the voices in my head are telling me to talk to you.

Roses are red Violets are gold Get on your knees And do what your told

He i would love to have sex with you She. I know but you have aids

I can tell you are single. How? Because you're ugly

guy: do you like sea food? girl: hell yes, I got crabs, would you like some

Man: Comon babe a little BJ wont hurt anyone get down..... Woman: sorry im alergic to peanuts

Hey, I got some of the worst ratings on Horsehead network! Really? Moral: You bet!

there is a 50% chance that we make s** tonight from my side i agree

Are you doing push-ups with your knees down? Cuz im not sure if this is working out.

I hate you already.

Guy: Hey :) Guy: Hey to you too :) Don't jump to conclusions people. They're gay.

Why do cops eat donuts so much? Because they are delish

Did you fall from heaven? Cause you d*** sure look like a demon!

Male: Paper or plastic? Female: What? Male: Paper or plastic, you know, to put over your head.

I put the STD in STuD all i need is U!

Male: It's super hard and long. Female: I have always been under the impression that the GED is relatively simple.

i'm a doctor.... maybe i can fix that thing you call a face

me- hey baby wanna hve sexual intercourse girl- sure because using the word intercourse in a sentence tunrs me on.

Anti-Pickup Line

Our Updated iOS App!

The Anti Joke Book