A goat goes to the store and asks the store clerk where the potatoes are. The clerk told the goat to check aisle 5 for the potatoes. The goat goes to aisle 5 and there were no potatoes.

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Hey big girl ;), why you alone? You ate all of your friends?

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Dont people ever get tired of PRETENDING like they dont need others aproval? I NEED APPROVAL I NEED APPROVAL! Moral: I REALLY DO! YEEEEEEEEES BECAUSE...Uh...you matter more than me? Nah, nothing like that, only I matter more than you...

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Guy: wow! Why are you naked and on top of me? Girl: What are you talking about! We are at a bar! Guy: Oh sorry I am a psychic and keep getting flashes of the near future...

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Black dude at bar: HERE COMES THE COLE-TRAIN BABY! WANNA RIDE! Girl: So I assume your name is Cole right? Dude: Uh... actually no but... WAIT! where are you going!

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Huge blue man: I AM THE APOCALYPSE! YOU ARE NOT FIT TO SURVIVE! Woman: EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEK! Huge blue man: "facepalm" THIS GAME, IS OVER! Moral: Dont start out too strong...

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There must be an angel missing from Heaven, because I've got it tied up in my basement. (It keeps saying something about a fancy dress party, but I'm not falling for that one again; that's how Batman escaped.)

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Hold me pint love i'm going for a dump.

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are u an angle because i have a boner oh what fail

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Flipping a coin to give you my number or not to give you my number

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hey i know spanish french german russian and Punjabi. got a talented tongue ;)

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Husband: Honey, I heard that when you die, you come back as a different creature! Wife: Really!? I want to come back as a cow!! Husband: You're obviously not listening.

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Girls hate me, they always discuss about how they regret fucking with me over and over again. Moral: Thumb me down, I know ya love me.

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Man: I am willing to give my life for you. Woman: How about you fucking get one instead and rather seek me out then? Moral: M-M-M-Morale breaker!

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Him: Nice legs. What time do they open? Her: Members only, I'm afraid,

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Are you from tennessee? Cuz it looks like your missing some teeth.

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Boy: Did it hurt? Girl: *sigh* Did what hurt? (Expecting him to say "When you fell from heaven") Boy: When you broke through the earths crust, ascending from hell.

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Man and woman in bed: Man: You know I am somewhat a deviant right? Woman: Sure but I am drunk so lets just do it.. Man: I AM SO GONNA BANG YOU! (Man throws dynamite at woman) Woman: WHAT THE FUUUUUUUUUUU Moral: BANG INDEED... case closed.

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Me noob days again: She: So, you like it here sweetheart? Me: Excuse me, why the hell are you rubbing my leg? She: Would you prefer I rub something else? Me: What the hell am I doing here anyways Duh! Then I sober up at home... And ran towards the shower, its really not that easy to drown yourself to death in a shower is it?

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What do you get when you cross a chicken with glue? My d***

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And then it hit me.....no really now I'm bleeding

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Boy: did it hurt when you fell from heaven Girl: I'm a antsiest

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You want to sleep with me and i want to sleep with you. I'm at least half right.

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No more morals? I read his crap for hours! Moral: ;( Bye man.

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Anti-Pickup Line

A collection of responses to pickup lines, and just bad ones in general!

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