I have never dated a horse-faced woman before :)

Man: Wanna come to my place? Woman: Maybe if you take of the ski-mask and black clothing... Man: But then you'll ruin the surprise! :(

Roses are red Violets are blue I have a gun Get in the van

There's a reason why they call my penis the Bunker Buster.

there is a 50% chance that we make s** tonight from my side i agree

Criminals are even more smarter these days My wife woke me up in the middle of the night and said that there were burglars downstairs so I went quietly looking for them when I realised I'm not married

He i would love to have sex with you She. I know but you have aids

Guy: Where have you been all my life? Girl: In my room hiding from you.

-My love for you is like diarrhea, I cant hold it in...

Seriously tho mah bebeh... Did you ask for a Pepsi or mah cocka-colah?

Husband: Honey, I heard that when you die, you come back as a different creature! Wife: Really!? I want to come back as a cow!! Husband: You're obviously not listening.

excuse me my eyes are up here thats great........where are your nipples

Male: It's super hard and long. Female: I have always been under the impression that the GED is relatively simple.

-How did your date go last night? -It was going alright but then I started crying uncontrollably. -Nervous habit? -Pepper spray.

Boy: does your face hurt Girl: No. Why Boy Because it sure is hurting me

If your happy and you know it clap your hands!! What if I lost my hands in Nam while I was singing this song and a plane killed my friend causing me to ct off both of my hands?

Wife: I have a confession to tell you my wife said to me one day... Before we got together I was raped by a masked man and I really liked it. Me: I know.

Mario: Ey princess, wanna make the sexy time eh? Princess: With a fat Italian plumber? HELL NO! Bowser: MWAHAHAHA I AM SO GONNA RAPE YOU WITH MY SPINY DICK! Princess: HELP HELP MARIO I WILL DO ANYTHING JUST SAVE ME! NO BOWSER PLEASE DO NOT PUT IT IN THERE! ITS TOO TIGH... Shigeru Miyamoto: So this is how I wanted to make the Super Mario series... sexy eh? Girl: DISGUSTING! Shigeru Miyamoto: Well what do you think about the idea with Monkey Dong and the other girl tha...HEY WHERE ARE YOU GOING?

Girl: You look so happy, I am glad this is working out. Freud: Maaaaan I was just thinking about fucking my mom! Moral: Sickman Fraud.

Hi there, the voices in my head are telling me to talk to you.

-Hi miss are you a catchup? -hey is this some corny pick-up line?,,,okay fine. why? -because I want to dip my hotdog to you

Hello im a thief and I'm here to steal your purse

Hey big girl ;), why you alone? You ate all of your friends?

Are you doing push-ups with your knees down? Cuz im not sure if this is working out.

Anti-Pickup Line

A collection of responses to pickup lines, and just bad ones in general!

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