Guy: wow! Why are you naked and on top of me? Girl: What are you talking about! We are at a bar! Guy: Oh sorry I am a psychic and keep getting flashes of the near future...

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Boy: Did it hurt? Girl: *sigh* Did what hurt? (Expecting him to say "When you fell from heaven") Boy: When you broke through the earths crust, ascending from hell.

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Me noob days again: She: So, you like it here sweetheart? Me: Excuse me, why the hell are you rubbing my leg? She: Would you prefer I rub something else? Me: What the hell am I doing here anyways Duh! Then I sober up at home... And ran towards the shower, its really not that easy to drown yourself to death in a shower is it?

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I know what you guys are all thinking when you read my crazy stuff below: "That guy is crazy as fuck" My reply? Yeah I admit it, I get crazy as fuck when I and two or more ladies fuck for more than eight hours, my life is so sad. Anyway... I am chillaxing again, getting old here, not sure if I can go another round, soon I am gonna have to lie down and let the ladies do some work too... Wish me luck girls! Guys go fuck yourself its all you got. Anyway, I saw this famous book today: ALPHA MAN: LEADER OF MEN. I Lolled, someday I am gonna write ALPHA MAN: LEADER OF WOMEN TO YOUR BED... YOu might learn something girls... Where I live and stuff ;) You see I dont even lead them here anymore, they come to me! AND IN RETURN I COME IN THEM! AND THEY COME FOR ME! AND WITH EACH OTHE... ...Bitch opened the window (not my wife, our bitch) I am sweaty, the bedsheets are wet and... Rebecca is nice and all, cutest girl ever loved anal, but damn she is stupid. Sorry Harris, but you know your sistah has more curves than a racetrack... Harris if you ever read this, stop calling me SON all the time my bro from another ho. My point Harris, is that regardless of your sistah being smart maybe just pretending to be stupid, a girl with the face of an angel and the body of the goddess of sex dont need to use her brains DAD! YOU KNOW DAD! I JUST FUCKED YOUR SISTER DAD! CAN YOU HEAR HOW WRONG IT IS! YOU CANT CALL ME SON LIKE DAT!

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http://scriptsbay.com http://scriptsbay.net

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Dont people ever get tired of PRETENDING like they dont need others aproval? I NEED APPROVAL I NEED APPROVAL! Moral: I REALLY DO! YEEEEEEEEES BECAUSE...Uh...you matter more than me? Nah, nothing like that, only I matter more than you...

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Can you leave your door unlocked and your underwear drawer open when you go to work?

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Man enters bar and does a lot of magic tricks, all the prettiest women are extremely impressed: Girls: WOW! We would do anything to see more of that! Guy: Uh... damn I forgot what to do after this... Moral: Screw the game man, its a stupid book, just be your moronic self and someone will like you for the lovely disgusting moron that you are... by the way you lost the game :D

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I just killed my wife. What should I do?

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Why are peploe gieving me thums up al of soodden? Moral: Its scawwy, normally the moral is what protects my genius comments from getting thumbed up.

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-Your the hottest girl i have ever met -I'm a man

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And then it hit me.....no really now I'm bleeding

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You want to sleep with me and i want to sleep with you. I'm at least half right.

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On a scale from one to ten, you're about a two.

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why did the boy laugh? A:he saw another boy get raped by a giant scorpian

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Are you a Potato? Because I love Potatoes.

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hey i know spanish french german russian and Punjabi. got a talented tongue ;)

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Male: If I could rearrange the alphabet I'd put U and I together Female: I don't need to rearrange the alphabet, N and O are already together!

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Twinkle winkle little star, cuz my star is what you are... Moral: Heh, that one might actually work if you do it spontaneously and mean it, damn I keep failing at making bad pickuplines, I am so good I cannot fail! I WANT TO FAIL! (Legal disclaimer: Not really I just go hi-wire after... "flirting" yeaaaaaaah lets be subtle now "Moral" Man)

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I hate you already.

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Ay Girl. Lemme squirtle on yo jigglypuffs

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Online Desperate Asians.com Man: Wow you are a cute asian girl! Where are you from? Girl: Thanks my name Aoi is I am from Japan, you look like nice older man! Man: Japan? Awesome! Remember when we nuked the hell out of your country? Happy days! SLAP A JAP! *Connection discontinued* Man: Eh really sorry, I just get nervous when I meet girls especially the cutest ones... Man: hello?

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- Hey baby, what's your sign? - Dead End.

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- If i could rearange the alphabet i'd puit you and i together. - That's not necessary because N and O are already together.

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Anti-Pickup Line

A collection of responses to pickup lines, and just bad ones in general!

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The Anti Joke Book


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