- Anti-Pickup Line

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK! Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

Hey baby, you're really hot, I like girls with some meat for my bone.

Muslim guy: "Hey can I get your number?" Chick:"Nine eleven"

You know, I had a great pickup line, but I just forgot it.

Girl: Do you know any good movies? Boy: Snakes on a plane Girl: Whats it about? Boy: It's about Horses.. on a boat.

Dude: Did you fart? Girl: No Dude: Oh I'm sorry because you blew me away

Criminals are even more smarter these days My wife woke me up in the middle of the night and said that there were burglars downstairs so I went quietly looking for them when I realised I'm not married

man: wanna know how i know we're going to f**k tonight? woman: how? man: cuz im stronger than you!

- So, wanna go back to my place? - Well, I don't know. Will two people fit under a rock? -That depends on the size of the rock. -You don't really get it, do you? -Get what?

GUY- Are you from heaven.....cuz it sure as hell doesn't look like it.

Your hair is really beautiful. Thanks. Can I make a wig out of it?

Man: Hey, you dont look that fucking ugly, wanna go home with me? mirror: shatters Moral: If your ugliness ever shatters your mirror let me know, ill look at it and it will assemble itself back on its own.

I have never dated a horse-faced woman before :)

Boy: So...Um...How's life? Girl: Great, until you came along.

-Good thing I brought my library card, 'cause I'm checking you out! -What a shame, it's expired.

Girl: Hey, why don't you and I go out to dinner? Guy: Thanks, but if I wanted to watch a whore stuff her face full of meat, I'd just load up Redtube.

-Hi miss are you a catchup? -hey is this some corny pick-up line?,,,okay fine. why? -because I want to dip my hotdog to you

-Your the hottest girl i have ever met -I'm a man

Are you a Potato? Because I love Potatoes.

Man: I bet you havent seen a really big dick before ;) ;) Woman: No... but I have seen yours... The man proceeds to stare at the floor and leaves in shame...

“I've been looking for a girl like you - not you, but a girl like you.” (Groucho Marx)

Whenever I look at stars I think of you... Because your only beatiful from a distance.

male- are you from Tenessee female- why? am I the only ten you see? male- no, i was just going to say you look a little inbred.

Anti-Pickup Line

Our Updated iOS App!

The Anti Joke Book