- Anti-Pickup Line

I told my wife I met someone who looked just like her she asked Was she gorgeous I didn't know what to say.

- I'd do anything for you. - Die.

If you were a booger, I'd pick you first.

Guy - Do you want to go outside and play rape? Girl - No, Guy - That's the spirit

Lady: Is your name REAAAAAAAAALLY Moral? Moral: Stupid big titted bimbo... seems im getting laid tonight...just like I was today, and by midday and... yeah lie.. I mean brag a lot I do not have sex THAT many times a day... okay I lied again... Anyway vote me for president at least I am honest... well actually that was a lie but...

Boy-Did it hurt when you fell from heaven? Girl-Not until I heard that horrible pick-up line.

Did it hurt when you fell from heaven and banged every guy on the way down?

Hey baby, let me take you to heaven.

Hey baby! If I said you had a good body, would you hold it against me? - [ It's unknown who originally said this. Maybe it was some rowdy guy in a 1970s disco].

Are you from tennessee? Because your inbred and retarted.

Him: Did it hurt? Her: Did what hurt? Him: When you fell from the whore tree and banged everyone on the way down

Roses are Red, Violets are blue, I cant rhyme, ever since my dog and I were walking down the street and then he died and then i cried and then i died and then he cried

Sigh, reminds me I am banging a girl named Tina, and one named Line right? Plus my wife whose name I wont reveal because she matters (Line, Tina, you do not!) Anyway, when people ask me "what the hell was that noise Nero (No idea what Neronism is, fuck him for stealing my name) I tell them "meh I was just screwing Line and Tina" People always go like... Man... YOU DONT HAVE TO LIE TO ME SON! YOU GOT STREET CRED HERE MODAFOCA! Tina and Line? You cant come up with better names SON? EH? If you wanna lie to me again SON, Then you get some original names SON! And I go like... So, can your sister sit down now? And he goes all like SHEET, was that you? Nice score man! And then I went "thats your sister you know that right?" Anyway, you want me now? INSTA ANTI PICKUPLINE... BECAUSE WHO NEEDS PICKUPLINES AT ALL! I AM JUST BEING MEEEEEEEEEEE! AND YOU MIGHT HATE ME!!!!!!! BUT YOU WOMEN STILL END UP TALKING ABOUT HOW YOU HATE THAT GUY YOU FUCKED LAST NIGHT! AND YOUR GIRLFRIENDS! Man... I need another Smoke... SMOKE WINS FAILTALITY. Ps: Yo Harris, stop congratzing me for banging your sister, she is not a nice catch for youz! She is your sistah DUDE! STOP GIVING ME THE THUMBS UPS EVERYTIME SHE COMPLAINS HER ASS IS STILL SORE... I mean does he get it? Or does youz congrats me because you dont understand that Rebecca your "innocent" sister is really into anal something I usually just reserve for the... actually good girls...

if I could re-arrange the alphabet, I'd put my dick in your ass

You wanna go somewhere? Yeah, where? The Swingers Association.

Do you wanna go halves in a bastard?

Me: You know what bitch... You are burp such a bitch... That I am just gonna smear peanut butter on my crotch and... Lady: Dude, I am a man but okay! Me: You are a guy? Did you have to tell me that? I mean I got beer googles but I hear perfectly well! Then his girlfriend which happened to be my cousin showed up and... facepalm

How much do you love me? Look at the stars and count them Bu-but it's afternoon Exactly

-You wanna get laid tonight? -You wanna never have sex again?

I have a knife and a penis. Choose which one goes in you.

Do you have cancer, because you look diseased.

"Are you a parking ticket?" "What?" "You’ve got fine written all over you"

If you were a booger i would pick you Good thing you have no hands

You must be tired... I assume you are because I am after following you on your four mile run through the park today.

Anti-Pickup Line

A collection of responses to pickup lines, and just bad ones in general!

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