Woman and man on picnicking date at the forest: (Man gets bit in his pingas by a snake..) Man: ARGH! HEALP HEALP! Woman: OMG! I have to call the doctor! RIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIING Doctor! My date was bitten by a poisonous snake! What can we do! Doctor: The only option would be to suck the poison out of the bitten area or else he will probably die... "Click" Man: ARGH! WHAT DID THE DOCTOR SAY! PLEASE ITS GETTING NUMB! WHAT DID HE SAY! Woman: He said you are gonna die... :( Moral: She may not have sucked, but this sure did :P

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Hey, does this rag smell like chloroform to you?

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How you doin? go away- I have a gun

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Ps: I was signing books today, and some douche asked me: Are you that Neronism dude on Horsehead? YOu suck! Anyway, Fuck Neronism. Nero (the other one and his "peeps" are fuckups. (Below: Well actually Tina said if my wife can join, just as my wife said yes... ...And you would think that screwing somebody else after asking your wife is immoral... DO YOU KNOW HOW MUCH I LOVE MY WIFE BECAUSE OF WHO SHE IS? Its called trust people *cape flowing in the air moon in background* Trust! NeroMetal I play Street Fighter V, And am an author, and I guess I get laid a lot... AND I HAVE NO IDEA WHAT NERONISM OR THAT OTHER ASSHOLE IS! I just called myself asshole...

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I hope you want kids, cause i've left my condoms at my girlfriends place.

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Hey baby, can I cream in your chocolate?

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man-hey baby you wanna go somewhere girl-no thanks hells over there

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How about you swing by my place so we can do some complex algebraic functions.

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Male: I'd give her one Female: I wouldn't have sex with you if you were the last person on earth Male: I was rating you out of 10 you ugly bitch

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Boy-Did it hurt when you fell from heaven? Girl-Not until I heard that horrible pick-up line.

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Sorry, I don't wanna date a guy who's best pickup line is cocaine.

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- How 'bout we go to your place and take a shower together? - I think my husband and little baby would get a kick out of that!

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F: I AM SO DRUNK AND HORNY I COULD FUCK ANYONE M: Hey, wanna fuck? F: I SAID ANYONE.. Not anything... Heck I got standards! Moral: Heck she has standards! Her dog is someone!

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Man: (in indian accent) HELLO I AM VERY RICH INDIAN MAN, I HAVE COLLECTION OF EXPENSIVE CARS AND LIMOS, I TAKE LADY HOME AND MAKE SWEET LOVE TO HER, THEN GIVE HER LOTSA JEWELS AND MONEY! Woman: Cool ill come home with you. Man: Uh... can you lend me money for the bus?

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Farewell to thy, you have been most amusing. Moral: Has left the building.

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Hey, I got some of the worst ratings on Horsehead network! Really? Moral: You bet!

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Guy: Hey :) Guy: Hey to you too :) Don't jump to conclusions people. They're gay.

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Do women shake the petrol pump after filling or is that just a guy thing?

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Wanna come home to my star destroyer and play with my lightsaber? No? How about just a trip down the Enterprise bridge to have fun with my romulans?... if you know what I mean? ;) ;)

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Am I having a erection or am I just glad to see you? Moral: My d1ck in my hand is HARDly a better option than my d1ck in a bush.

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hey baby i just came in my pants

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Hey girl, ever tried a double dildo with a man before? ;)

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If you were on a shelf at build a bear workshop ....... I would stuff you , except it wouldn't be with cotton

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Male: It's super hard and long. Female: I have always been under the impression that the GED is relatively simple.

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Anti-Pickup Line

A collection of responses to pickup lines, and just bad ones in general!

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